Classic Insults â€” Right on Target!

Archer

“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” - Winston Churchill

“I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.”- Irvin S. Cobb

“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.” - Clarence Darrow

“His ears made him look like a taxicab with both doors open.” - Howard Hughes (about Clark Gable)

“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.” - Paul Keating

“He had delusions of adequacy.” - Walter Kerr

“There’s nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won’t cure.” - Jack E. Leonard

“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.” - Groucho Marx

“He has the attention span of a lightning bolt.” - Robert Redford

“In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily.” - Charles, Count Talleyrand

“A solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg who looked like he was waiting for a vacancy in the Trinity.” - Mark Twain

“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.” - Mark Twain

“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.” - Mae West

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.” - Oscar Wilde

“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.” - Oscar Wilde

“He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.” - Billy Wilder

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