I THOUGHT I HAD IT ~ YEAH SURE! LOOK AGAIN, HARV

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By Harvey Tobkes

As many of you know, November 20th I had my 93rd birthday in and I drive a 21-year-old Toyota with only 29,000 miles.

The other day I was stopped at a light, and in the car alongside a very attractive woman in her late 50’s or early 60’s was making some kind of gesture or hand signal or waving at me.

Oh Boy! I started to get ideas that were not age appropriate. The thought that a woman was flirting with me boosted my old ego; I looked in the side-view mirror for a little reassurance…and “yeah, not too bad!” There she was trying to get my attention; she was rotating her hand, meaning I should roll down the window. Wow! This was getting better all the time. I hit the button and she reached across and handed me her card. Just then the light changed to green and she drove off.

I looked at the card and the words “Private Geriatric Nurse” jumped up at me and took the air out of my balloon. What a bitch…she saw an old guy in an old car and smelled an opportunity to drum up business. I drove home, went to the bathroom to look in the mirror and…Oy Vey! From the bathroom I hurried to the liquor cabinet and mixed a strong Bloody Mary because that nurse knew a good prospect when she saw one.

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