TODAY I AM AN OCTOGENARIAN AND I’M…

I’m… the life of the party, even if it lasts until 8 p.m.
I’m… very good at opening childproof caps — with a hammer.
I’m… usually interested in going home before I get to where I am going.
I’m… smiling all the time because I can’t hear a thing you’re saying.
I’m… very good at telling stories; over and over and over and over…
I’m… aware that other people’s grandchildren are not nearly as cute as mine.
I’m… well cared for — long term care, eye care, dental care.
I’m… beginning to realize that aging is not for wimps.
I’m… a walking storeroom of facts….. I’ve just lost the key to the storeroom door.