Harvey Tobkes header

HE HAD HER FATHER’S HEART

——–HEART——–

A wedding in Pennsylvania included a very special guest. Bride Jeni Stepien, (whose father was killed in a robbery 10 years earlier), invited the man who received her dad’s donated heart to walk her down the aisle.

When the recipient, Arthur Thomas, arrived from New Jersey, he held out his wrist. He said, “I thought that would be the best way for her to feel close to her dad, after all, that’s her father’s heart beating in my chest and pulsing in my wrist”.

Conversation Posted at 10/23/18 0:24 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: General



A DANGEROUS DISEASE

On Not Wanting to Know What Hurts You
By HENRY FOUNTAIN

It’s hiding your head in the sand, the way Americans think about illness. A disease like diabetes gallops practically out of control, with estimates that 21 million Americans have it and 45 million more could develop it. Yet relatively few people worry about it or alter their behavior to postpone or possibly prevent its onset.

Doctor

The net effect for many people, when a television news report trumpets a death caused by a flesh-eating disease (a staph infection that affects maybe 1,500 Americans each year), it is enough to make many people panic.

A chronic illness like diabetes, on the other hand, may be dealt with in part through diet and exercise. Sadly, many people mistakenly believe if many others have a disease but are not hospitalized or dying, it must be relatively benign.

My Comment: Diabetes in a quiet way is taking a devastating toll on at least 1 of every 10 Americans. As individuals we need to focus more on this serious threat to our health and our lives.

On Not Wanting to Know What Hurts You – New York Times

Conversation Posted at 10/23/18 0:07 | Comments Off on A DANGEROUS DISEASE | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Health



WHY IT’S GOOD TO BE JEWISH…OR IS IT?

———————Photobucket———————

Jews and agnostics are 20 percent more sexually active than Catholics and Protestants.

The study that produced this statistic also found that Baptists have slightly more sex than the national average, while “Presbyterians and Lutherans are slightly below average.”

“There’s more shame and guilt with the Christian religions,” says Herbenick, who is also the author of Because It Feels Good: A Woman’s Guide to Sexual Pleasure and Satisfaction. “The Jewish religion tends to be more permissive about sexuality.” Another study found that over twice as many observant married Jewish women reported having sex three to six times per week as married women in general.

Ellen Labinsky et al. (2009): Observant Married Jewish Women and Sexual Life: An Empirical Study. Conversations 5, 37-59 —

My Comment: I find the research and statistics to be way off base and a lot of baloney. I am thinking about all the Jewish wives who inspired the above cartoon and use the classic turn-off…”Not tonight dear, I have a headache!” So, how could there be all that activity?

Conversation Posted at 10/22/18 4:02 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Useless Info



TOUR OF SANTORINI GREEK ISLAND

Conversation Posted at 10/22/18 3:51 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Travel, Video YouTube



CAUGHT IN THE ACT

By Harvey Tobkes

Did you read the story from Reuters News about the couple that got caught having sex in a church confessional box? I kid you not!

———————–

It happened in the town of Cesena, Italy, where I guess they either don’t have hotels or he was too cheap to rent a room or as they say, “it just happened in the heat of the moment,”…must have been pretty hot in that church. The amorous duo were “in flagrante delicto!” I wonder if it was the moaning and groaning that called attention to the lover’s secret trysting place.

In any case, the couple, in their early 30s, were detained by police and cautioned for obscene acts in public and disturbing a religious function. Yeah! Just imagine being the poor priest, trying to celebrate Mass, while competing with an XXX rated show in the confessional box.

Sounds like they didn’t have a guy like Johnny Cochran as their lawyer because their “avocato” came up with a lame excuse and defense theory of WHY?…He said it happened because they had been drinking all night and realized they had gone too far.
——————————–
I don’t know WHAT liquid they were imbibing, but I quote the line from, “When Harry Met Sally,” I’ll have what they had.”

Source: They Had Sex…WHERE

Conversation Posted at 10/22/18 3:15 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Odd News



THE MOST HATED MAN IN AMERICA

Conversation Posted at 10/22/18 3:05 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: General



AUSSIE SONG…”DON’T BITE THE HAND THAT FEEDS YA”

Conversation Posted at 10/22/18 1:11 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: General



IN MEMORY OF WHITEY

Eskimos Enjoy Bear Of A Meal

————————————————Photobucket——————————–
[Breaking News from Hollywood, Florida]…By Cap Peterson

Yesterday, officers from the Broward County Dog & Bear Pound baited a trap with Klondike ice cream bars and captured a 1500 pound, 9 feet tall Polar Bear. “We get about 20 to 30 bear calls a month,” said Broward County, Florida, Pound person, Fred Baer, (no relation to the Baer Furniture people), “but I can’t remember the last time we had a polar bear alert. They’re fairly rare this far south. We found him wearing a Nome, Alaska, pet tag with the name, “Whitey,” and drove him all the way home to Nome.

His owner said it wasn’t the first time he ran away. A couple of years ago, Whitey crossed the Bering Straits and ended up in the Moscow Circus. He got a job as performing bear, but during the show he had to jump through a fire hoop, so he quit after 3 months. The guy in Nome wasn’t real happy to see that Whitey found his way back. He said the bear was eating him out of house and home and had gulped down his favorite daughter a few weeks before. He also complained Whitey insisted on hibernating in the guest bedroom.

Whitey’s trip South to Florida was a fatal mistake. Tourists sometimes fall into that trap. “We tried to chase him away but he wouldn’t leave,” Baer said, “and I sure as hell wasn’t going to drive up to Nome again. I’m pissed because I wore out my Johnny Horton ‘North To Alaska’ eight-track tape on the first trip up to the 49th state.

But I digress, back here in Hollywood, Florida, when Whitey menacingly charged a group of curious school kids, Baer and fellow officer, Smokey Barski had no choice but to shoot the four-legged visitor from the north. “It was pretty grizzly,” Smokey Barski lamented. “He’s not the first tourist to get shot in South Florida and probably not the last. We usually don’t get ’em this big unless they’re out on the beach in speedos.”

Local descendants of Alaskan Eskimos skinned and butchered the bear and took it by dog sled to “The Igloo Social Club” on Dixie Highway. The hide was turned into clothing for use next winter. “A good polar bear coat can really take the sting out of a frigid Florida winter,” one appreciative club member said.

Luigi Yamamoto, Nome native born Inuit, and manager of The Igloo, was ecstatic. “We had a great dinner, saved the bear paws for breakfast and still have more than a thousand pounds of meat left in the freezer. It made us realize how much we miss our native food. A couple of the ladies even baked a couple of Eskimo Pies. It would have been absolutely perfect, if we’d had a little whale blubber for appetizers. We are crazy about our whale blubber, somewhat like the Jewish people who love gefllte fish.”

Yamamoto said the meat was a pleasant change from the usual South Florida fare. “My people have just never gotten used to chicken wings and pizza,” he said. “If anybody reading this has a polar bear, or a walrus for that matter, they want to get rid of, we’d be glad to come pick it up.”


Attention viewers: Luigi can be reached at:
——————————————————————————————————
~~~~~~~~~1-800-Harpoon~~~~~
——————————————————————————————————

This article was written by Cap Peterson for Cahoots Quarterly, August 2008 Edition, “The official Newspaper of… Hollywood Beach and Beyond.”

Conversation Posted at 10/22/18 0:02 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Humor, See credit, Spoof



TEN MOST DANGEROUS JOBS IN THE WORLD

Conversation Posted at 10/21/18 3:20 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Informational, Video YouTube



ZORBA’S DANCE ~ ANDRÉ RIEU

If you like this posting, please use the “Send this to a friend.” See below.

Conversation Posted at 10/21/18 3:19 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Entertainment, Video YouTube



Harvey Tobkes

This site received ~1,200,000
hits per month 

About Harvey Tobkes

Harvey Tobkes lives in Florida where he enjoys writing about life.

Get Firefox logo