With Thanksgiving only couple of days away, I have been thinking about the many things I am thankful for, and reflecting over the past my mind takes me back many years to March 31st, 1953; it was my first date with Anita. At that time Kismet was a popular Broadway show, so I got tickets and we both enjoyed it very much. But I should have known there was something strongly prophetic happening that evening.
To cut a long story short, the outstanding hit song of the show, “And This Is My Beloved,” was the one we chose to be sung at our wedding.
So, as you all know by now, the word “Kismet” means Fate, and my Kismet would be to marry Anita.
For you young people, I am going to post below the picture of a wondrous miracle in life, and this will probably happen to you. After all, who knew when Anita and I first heard that haunting song, “And This Is My Beloved,” it would be the background music I hear when I look at our family portrait picture.
Someday, when you are my age and looking down from the top of the mountain, you too will be proud of what two people can create. I remember when it was just the two of us, now we set the table for 13.
**************ALL YOU NEED IS KISMET*********
By Harvey Tobkes
A friend called Anita this morning and after some usual chit chat the friend announced that today, November 24th was her birthday. Anita wished her the best and mentioned that coincidentally, today, the 24th, is our anniversary.
The friend offered her congratulations and asked if it was a “milestone,” anniversary year. Anita replied, “No, I wouldn’t call it a milestone, but I would call it a MIRACLE”. I agree! And after 60 years of marriage, (no, that’s not a typo six-oh is correct) I can safely say, all my young pals were wrong. THEY SAID IT WOULD NEVER LAST. Anita says…there are times she agreed with them.
The friend offered her congratulations and asked if it was a “milestone,” anniversary year.
Anita replied, “No, I wouldn’t call it a milestone, but I would call it a MIRACLE”. I agree!
And after 60 years of marriage, (no, that’s not a typo six-oh is correct) I can safely say, all my young pals were wrong. THEY SAID IT WOULD NEVER LAST. Anita says…there are times she agreed with them.
By Harvey Tobkes
Sixty years of anything… does not necessarily qualify you as an expert. After all, you could have been making the same mistakes repeatedly each year, without advancing.
Nevertheless, I offer you a little advice based on my long marriage. I openly admit that I still have a lot to learn, and I am far from the perfect husband, but I have come a long way from the absolute idiot Anita married 60 years ago.
R-E-S-P-E-C-T is most important in a relationship. And then there is communication which involves the art of one person TALKING and one person actively LISTENING, and that’s not as simple as it sounds. During a heated argument or when your anger is at a peak do not use vile language or say things that are meant to hurt and torture your spouse; things that never can be forgiven or forgotten. Care about your spouse’s feelings; never lie or betray the other’s trust.
Keep the romantic flame burning; the bedroom is the most important room in your home and not because you sleep there for 8 hours. Yes! holding hands (we still do) and a hug and kiss daily (we still do) can go a long way to help you appreciate each other.
Anita has never given up trying to get me to play by these rules. Let’s hope the next 60 will be easier.
By the way, Anita (my Golden Girl) just peeked over my shoulder; she read this entire article and then made a very profound and sobering statement, which I quote below:
“Harv, you’re so full of crap.”
Hey! Anita, watch your language.
According to the Guinness Book of World Records, the Lake Pontchartrain Causeway is the longest continuous bridge passing over water, the waters of New Orleans’s Lake Pontchartrain to be exact. The bridge is so long that for 8 of its 24 miles, you can’t see land in any direction.
Want to live longer, slim down, and lower your risk of heart disease, cancer, diabetes, and dementia? Adopting a Mediterranean diet that emphasizes whole grains, legumes, fruits and vegetables, lean sources of protein, and unsaturated fats (e.g., olive oil) can help get you there.
Even though it’s promoted as a diet to prevent heart disease, the Mediterranean menu can help keep your whole body in tip-top shape. “When you eat a diet that’s good for the heart, you’re doing your brain, liver, immune system, and every other system the same favor,” explains David Katz, MD, director of the Prevention Research Center at Yale University School of Medicine.
No Navy man worth his salt would consider John Paul Jones anything but the greatest hero in history. But…
John Paul Jones’ real name was simply John Paul. In a letter to Benjamin Franklin he admitted he’d killed a sailor in the West Indies and changed his name to escape punishment. He chose the name “Jones” from a Willie Jones of North Carloina, whom he admired. ‘Nuff said.
He never was a naturalized citizen of the United States. At one time he was the captain of some pirate ships and just before he died was a commodore of Catherine the Great’s Russian navy.
But he did contribute immensely to the fortunes of the struggling young Republic, and that’s good enough for yours truly.
From the book… The Joy of Trivia by Bernie Smith (1976)
Here is a site that is a little weird but still interesting.
Thought it might make a good ‘link of the day’.
Yes! I was able to blow out all the candles.
Young people ask…who wants to have 86 birthdays?
…I tell them, a person that’s 85.
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———————————————— If I said to you, “I have a great idea for a business. I’ll open a whole new type of coffee shop. Instead of charging 60 cents for coffee, I’ll charge $2.50, $3.50, $4.50, and $5.50. Not only that, I’ll have no tables, no chairs, no water, no free refills, no waiters, no busboys, serve it in cardboard cups, and have the customer clean it up for 20 minutes after they’re finished.” Would you say to me, “That’s the greatest idea for a business I ever heard! We can open a chain of these all over the world!” No, you would put me right into a sanitarium. And it’s burnt coffee! It’s burnt coffee at Starbuck’s, be honest about it. If you get burnt coffee in a coffee shop, you call a cop.You say, “It’s the bottom of the pot. I don’t drink from the bottom of the pot. But when it’s burnt at Starbuck’s, they say, “Oh, it’s a special roast. It’s a special bean from Argentina …..” And there are no chairs in those Starbucks. Instead, they have these high stools. You ever see these stools? You haven’t been on a chair that high since you were two. Old people are climbing and climbing to get to the top of the chair. And when they get to the top, they can’t even drink the coffee because there’s 12 people around one little table, and everybody’s saying, “Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me…..” Then they can’t get off the chair. Oldies are begging “Mister, could you get me off this?”
This is Jackie Mason’s take on Starbuck’s. Be sure to remember Jackie Mason’s voice as you read.
If I said to you, “I have a great idea for a business. I’ll open a whole new type of coffee shop. Instead of charging 60 cents for coffee, I’ll charge $2.50, $3.50, $4.50, and $5.50. Not only that, I’ll have no tables, no chairs, no water, no free refills, no waiters, no busboys, serve it in cardboard cups, and have the customer clean it up for 20 minutes after they’re finished.”
Would you say to me, “That’s the greatest idea for a business I ever heard! We can open a chain of these all over the world!” No, you would put me right into a sanitarium.
And it’s burnt coffee! It’s burnt coffee at Starbuck’s, be honest about it. If you get burnt coffee in a coffee shop, you call a cop.You say, “It’s the bottom of the pot. I don’t drink from the bottom of the pot. But when it’s burnt at Starbuck’s, they say, “Oh, it’s a special roast. It’s a special bean from Argentina …..”
And there are no chairs in those Starbucks. Instead, they have these high stools. You ever see these stools? You haven’t been on a chair that high since you were two. Old people are climbing and climbing to get to the top of the chair. And when they get to the top, they can’t even drink the coffee because there’s 12 people around one little table, and everybody’s saying, “Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me…..” Then they can’t get off the chair. Oldies are begging “Mister, could you get me off this?”
Now you become your own waiter. You walk around with a tray. “I’ll take the cookie. Where’s the butter? The butter’s here. Where’s the cream cheese? The cream cheese is there.” You walked around for an hour and a half selecting items, and then the guy at the cash register has a glass in front of him that says “Tips.” You’re waiting on tables for an hour, and you owe him money?
By Ana Veciana-Suarez. This is an excerpt from her article
The older I get, the greater the sense of urgency. The urgency to spend more time with loved ones, the urgency to write better, the urgency to visit faraway places, the urgency to learn more, do more, enjoy more. Middle age, particularly late middle age, is a track and field event — not the marathon, mind you, but the 50-yard dash. As time ticks down on the stopwatch of life and ability, I’m sprinting against a loyal rival: mortality.
To read the full article: >>>CLICK HERE< <<
Full credit should indeed go to the originator, Alonso Alvarez Barreda who created Historia de Un Letrero, [The Story of a Sign].
Every American military unit has a soldier named “Kowalski”.
Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.
All female showers always have peep holes for boys to look through.
When paying for a taxi, you don’t look at your wallet as you take out a bill to make sure it’s the right amount; just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare and include the tip.
If you’re ever on guard duty and another guard says, “it’s awfully quiet out there tonight”, the correct response is “yeah…too quiet.”
Every group of cowboys or soldiers has one guy who can play the harmonica.
Bibles, medals, and cigarette lighters stop bullets better than bulletproof vests.
If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick’s Day or Chinese New Year parade – at any time of year.
You are very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.
Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds – unless it’s the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.
All English people are either snooty or gay.
Every flea-bag hotel has a flashing, buzzing neon ‘Hotel’ sign just outside every window. And one of the letters is not working properly.
Every jail has a brutal guard and a scheming warden.
Having his wife go into labor makes every man a blithering idiot.
LaGuardia often officiated in municipal court. He handled routine misdemeanor cases, including, as Cerf wrote, a woman who had stolen a loaf of bread for her starving family. LaGuardia insisted on levying the fine of ten dollars.
Then he said “I’m fining everyone in this courtroom fifty cents for living in a city where a person has to steal bread in order to eat!” He passed a hat and gave the fines to the defendant, who left the court with $47.50
Bio of his life and career…http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fiorello_H._La_Guardia
Here’s a good answer I found on Quora.com written by Jerry Crespi an Industrial Psychologist.
If you research it, almost every generation felt that the kids were growing up too fast, or didn’t have the right values etc. I think it’s just human nature.
I can imagine a caveman talking to his friend Ug and saying, “Nowadays, those darn kids are using those fancy carved spear-heads when they go hunting dinasours, instead of using clubs and throwing rocks like we did as kids.”
Me: Can you tell us anything about your parents and their values?
Woody: My parents were very old world. They come from Brooklyn, which is the heart of the Old World. Their values in life are God and carpeting.
Me: As a child did you have any recurring dreams?
Woody: Yes! In my dream my parents finally realize that I’m kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: they rent out my room.
Me: What were your childhood ambitions?
Woody: I wanted to be an arch-criminal as a child, before I discovered I was too short.
Me: How did you do in college?
Woody: I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam: I looked into the soul of another boy.
Me: Do you consider yourself an intellectual?
Woody: I have never been an intellectual but I have this look.
Me: How do you rate yourself as a lover?
Woody: I’m such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own.
Me: What’s your comment on the bible quote “The lion and the calf shall lie down together.”
Woody: The calf won’t get much sleep.
Me: What is the most important organ in the human body?
Woody: My brain – it’s my second favorite organ.
Me: What makes you angry?
Woody: Some guy hit my fender, and I told him ‘be fruitful, and multiply.’ But not in those words.
Me: Any thoughts about life and death?
Woody: It’s not that I’m afraid to die. I just don’t want to be there when it happens.
Me: What do you think of this restaurant?
Woody: The food in this place is really terrible, and such small portions. That’s essentially how I feel about life.
CLICK TO WATCH THE VIDEO – IT’S WHAT BABYS DO!
You think you’ve got problems. Every time I go to a restaurant with friends, one of them gives me the check at the end of the meal and says, “Albert, you do the math.”
So anyway, a neutron walks into a bar. And the bartender says, “For you, no charge.”
And . . . The other day I’m at the deli and I say, “Waiter, there’s a sub-atomic particle in my borscht! It’s enormous! Look at it go!” So the waiter says, “I’m sorry, sir, but you know what Heisenberg says about the limitation of measuring two properties of a quantum object with infinite precision.” So I say, “But Werner Heisenberg was a big fat Nazi.” So the waiter says, “I’ll get the manager.”
“You think you have it bad. My mother won’t let me bring my girlfriend home for Thanksgiving. You know why? She says, “It’s all relatives.”
Have you heard the one about God? So He’s at Caesar’s Palace, standing next to the crap table and the croupier says, “But with all due respect, God, Albert Einstein says you don’t play dice with the universe. “Yeah,” says God, “Wasn’t Albert also wrong about the cosmological constant?”
“That’s all I got,” Einstein concludes. “You’ve been a great audience.”
Source:the web site of Andrew Tobias.
By Harvey Tobkes
Most individuals are vain and need luxuries to express themselves; they need to show others that they have money and power. They want a car that will gain them respect, envy and admiration, and they rationalize the purchase by telling themselves it is a reward they deserve, and if they can afford it why not flaunt it.
I’ve heard all this explained with a vivid analogy: They say if 10 men were all naked in a Turkish Bath, nobody could know who was who, as the main difference in that setting would probably be penis size. However, when they go out to their cars in the parking lot and one guy gets into a Bentley while the others have to settle into a Chevy, Ford, or a Toyota; we get the message.
That, my friends, is the real world and we are supposed to know, at that moment, which one to respect and envy.