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I WANT TO KNOW WHY?

toilet paper

Conversation Posted at 07/24/19 1:31 | Comments Off on I WANT TO KNOW WHY? | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Cartoons



ADVICE TO MEN ON MARRIAGE

Archer

By Harvey Tobkes

A successful marriage depends heavily on sexual attraction and satisfaction. All else can be fantastic, but if sexual compatibility is lacking, a huge problem develops.

In addition to that, it is important to be on the same wavelength on many other issues…ethics, honesty, intellect, humor, hygiene, social skills and religion, just to name a few.

If a couple are of different faiths, I am not saying a marriage cannot be successful, I am saying that tolerance, and a very low level of commitment to the religion they were given by their parents, would then be essential. Imagine an observant Jew married to a devout Catholic.

Somebody should write a book on the subject, but I have a short answer to the question of whom to marry and what qualities to seek in a wife.

Find a girl who is rich, smart and beautiful, a nymphomaniac with a 38 D bust, who cooks and cleans like a demon; she has no parents, and does not enjoy shopping, she adores only you, she loves saving money and hates using a credit card.

I guarantee…. you will live happily ever after.

Conversation Posted at 07/24/19 0:56 | Comments Off on ADVICE TO MEN ON MARRIAGE | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Advice, Just My Opinion



1913 ~ THE YEAR TALKING MOVIES WERE BORN

———————-———

In 1913, inventor Thomas Edison presented a talking movie. Through his own patented, but imperfect process, that combined his two inventions, the phonograph and movie technology.

The process was clumsy and imperfect: essentially a phonograph and movie projector were kept in sync by a cord that connected the two machines. The pictures and the visuals inevitably and (often) fell out of synchronization and had to be clumsily fixed by the projectionist while the thing was running.

Conversation Posted at 07/24/19 0:12 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Informational



I’LL CROSS THAT BRIDGE WHEN I COME TO IT. Haha!

BRIDGE
Would you dare crossing the Hussaini Bridge, World’s Most Dangerous Bridge located in Gilgit-Baltistan,Pakistan?

One misstep could mean your death.

Conversation Posted at 07/23/19 5:42 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: General



MY RUSSIAN HAIRCUT

—————————Sonya————————

By Harvey Tobkes

I needed a haircut so badly, I couldn’t stand to look at myself in the mirror. I don’t now why I delayed so long.

Today, being a busy Saturday my Italian barber could not give me a same-day appointment, but luckily, I remembered a neighbor recommending a Unisex hair salon in the walkway behind Publix Market, so I decided to check it out. The shop appeared small on the outside but when I walked in I saw they had 20 chairs, all occupied by ladies getting beautiful, and all women operators. I decided I would try pot-luck and go for it. Columbus took a chance, so why not me.

Somehow, I got lucky and the receptionist told me she had an opening in a couple of minutes. Sure enough a few minutes later a very heavy set Russian girl named Sonya introduced herself. I saw a person who was possibly an ex-women’s Olympic Wrestling Team gold medalist, who said in a thick KGB accent, “I ready give you nice haircut now.” We began with some preliminary conversation and she told me she was from Moscow and has been in the United States for 2 years. I told her my grandpa was born in Kiev and came to the United States in 1875. This chit-chat was all prior to her getting to work cutting my hair and then before anything else she started applying lipstick. I jokingly told her she didn’t have to get all dolled up for me; she giggled and said, “I feel naked no lipstick.” I said, it’s O.K. with me if you give me a haircut while you’re naked.

The Russian thought that was so funny, I think she’s still laughing. And as for me…after thinking it over, Sonya probably looked much better dressed, wearing lipstick, than undressed.

Sonya offered me my choice, she asked…what style you want? Look like Putin…very short hair, Stalin…leave a lot of hair, or Nikita Kruschev…no hair and she laughed. I chose to look like George Clooney but that would take a Russian miracle.

She used an electric clippers and in no time she said, “O.K. You finished now.” I looked in the mirror, and I saw…my grandpa.

Conversation Posted at 07/23/19 5:21 | View/add comments (1) | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Anita & Harvey Stories



WIND BENEATH MY WINGS

Leaving with us this musical treasure, native Hawaiian, Israel Kamakawiwo’ole, the giant man with the little ukulele and an angelic voice, passed away on June 26, 1997. This YouTube video presentation honors the man and his music. Aloha!

Conversation Posted at 07/23/19 4:59 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Music, Video YouTube



WHERE TO FIND BEST LOOKING MEN & WOMEN?

Conversation Posted at 07/23/19 4:20 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Video YouTube



TRUE STORY – JUST ANOTHER DAY AT THE BEACH

———-my coffee——–

By Harvey Tobkes

Today, I walked 1.5 miles at the beach. My other statistics were…speed of 2.5 mph, 3308 steps, 30 minutes, wind at 12 mph, 137 Calories burned.

At the half-way point, I was at the Haagen-Dazs store, so I had my usual hazelnut coffee and as a reward I added a small cup of Java Chip ice-cream. What a treat, but there was more. In front me on the line were 4 young gal pals all in thong string bikinis. My luck, I was standing in back of the one (of the 4) wearing a virtually invisible string exposing a full moon; she was giggling and gaggling with her group. When the server finally handed me my order, I looked into my cup and noticed the Java chip ice-cream instantly melted into a liquid and I wondered why that happened.

Not to worry, I won’t be writing a letter of complaint to the management.

Conversation Posted at 07/23/19 2:55 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Anita & Harvey Stories



FIND A TREASURE OF USEFUL INFORMATION RIGHT HERE

Amazing how many interesting topics are all presented in one place.

——-images36WLS42E——-

>>>>>CLICK HERE TO OPEN< <<<

Conversation Posted at 07/23/19 1:01 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Informational



WHERE CAN YOU FIND UNCONDITIONAL LOVE?

By Harvey Tobkes

In life the the people that really care about you are your parents, your grandparents and your spouse.

That’s it!

You know, in my little homily above I left children out of the special people that care about you, because often they do not love a parent unconditionally, which means loving in spite of a parent’s faults, and in many cases the love that is given is based on the size of the inheritance.

After rethinking all of this, I now conclude the only unconditional love you will ever get is…from your dog. You can kick a dog in the butt and the next minute he comes to lick your hand to tell you he forgives you and still loves you.
Awww, good dog!

Conversation Posted at 07/22/19 7:26 | Leave a comment | Mail Send this to a friend | Filed Under: Author: Harvey Tobkes, Just My Opinion



Harvey Tobkes

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About Harvey Tobkes

Harvey Tobkes lives in Florida where he enjoys writing about life.

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