Think1. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

2. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn’t it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

3. Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety-one?

4. What hair color do they put on the driver’s licenses of bald men?

5. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me … they’re cramming for their final exam.

6. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?

7. Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?

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