These are entries to a Washington Post competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic
first line… but the least romantic second line.

–Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.

-I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don’t take that paper bag off of your face.

-What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime!

-My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way?

Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I only slept with you because I was pissed.

-I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother.

-Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you. But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl’s empty, and so is your head.

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