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Moments after his conversion to Judaism, Mr. Mel Gibson paid a visit to the registrar’s office in Los Angeles County and had his name legally changed to “Melvin Gibstein” as proof of his commitment to his new chosen faith.

Then it was off to Malibu, where the 50-year old actor was bar mitzvahed on the beach in a small, private ceremony.

“Today, I am a man,” Mr. Gibstein said before a gathering of friends and well-wishers from the local tavern. “A Jew man!”

Mr. Gibstein, whose Lexus LS 470 sedan now sports a license plate reading “L-CHAIM,” said that he was “thoroughly enjoying being a Jew” and vowed to only shop wholesale from now on.

The actor added he would begin production of a new film, It’s A Mad, Mad, Mad, Matzoh, as soon as he kicks his drinking problem.

He said, “I am really committed to reheeb,” …”I mean rehab.”

Meanwhile, over 1000 Moyals, nationwide, volunteered to do a circumcision at no charge.

In response, Mr. Gibstein used a well-known Jewish expletive…”A bunch of ‘Meshuggunas’.”