You Will Never Hear This speech

Since congress does not want to spend any more money on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.

It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer them by saying, “darn tootin.”

Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time to eliminate hunger in America. It is time to eliminate homelessness in America. It is time for a National Health Care Plan in America. It’s time we found a cure for dread diseases, like cancer.

To the nations who supported us, a final thought…we owe you, and we won’t forget. Thanks guys! To the nations who opposed us, a final thought…you might want to learn to speak Arabic.

God bless America. Thank you and good night. If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you are reading it in English, thank a soldier.