A SEMI-LEGAL DOCUMENT

HARVEY’S LIVING WILL

Scale of justice

I, Harvey Tobkes , being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of greedy politicians who couldn’t pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it, or lawyers / doctors interested in simply running up the bills. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:

Martini
Steak
Margarita
Cold Beer
French fries
Pizza
Ice cream
Chocolate
Pastrami sandwich

It should be presumed that I won’t ever get better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.

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Published:
03.23.09 2:02
Category:
Spoof