GEMS FROM MAXINE

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1. The difference between the Pope and your boss…the Pope only expects you to kiss his ring.

2. Thoughts strike my mind like lightning, one brilliant Flash and then, poof… gone.

3. The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you’re in the bathroom.

4. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once.
The seat folded up, the drink spilled and that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.

5. It used to be only death and taxes now, of course, there’s shipping and handling, too.

6. My next house will have no kitchen – just a coin vending machine and a large trash can for the wrappers.

8. As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point the wrong way.

9. Jimmy Swaggert has written an impressive new book. It’s called …….’Ministers Do More Than Lay People’

10. Be who you are and say what you feel…because those that matter… don’t mind… and those that mind… don’t matter!


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