ON BEING A GOOD GRANDPARENT

Kids in pyramid

By Harvey Tobkes

I love my grandchildren like I loved my own children. The differences are, I do not try to be a parent. I give love, help, sympathy, and support; I play games like chess, or Scrabble, or throw a baseball back and forth or whatever. I send them some e-mail both serious and funny. I may offer some advice but only in a mild form. We are not their parents.

Likewise, (when it comes to our own children) we believe in not parenting a parent child. When the grandchildren are with me, I find it best to give them whatever they want because they are going home to their parents to resume what is normal, and we want the time spent with us to be a delight.

Last week, Anita and I bought 2 kites and took the kids to the beach; we let them fly those kites high and sent up messages. We had a kite war, and then they took the Bird Shaped Kites home to show their parents.

We show interest in the things they do well, and encourage them and reassure them about anything that is perhaps a challenge. After all, most children have strong talents and attributes and weak ones as well.

That about sums it up, and the story is probably not much different from that of millions of other families around the world.


About this entry