I’m at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I’ve just had a mirror put over my kitchen table. ~ Rodney Dangerfield

No man knows he is young while he is young. ~ G. K. Chesterton

By the time you’re eighty years old you’ve learned everything.
The only problem is you have to remember it. ~ George Burns

Shall we danceEverything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that’s down can come up. ~ George Burns

Life’s tragedy is that we get old too soon and wise too late. ~ Benjamin Franklin

The age of a woman doesn’t mean a thing. The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles. ~ Sigmund Z. Engel

I wake up every morning at nine and grab for the morning paper. Then I look at the obituary page. If my name is not on it, I get up. ~ Harry Hershfield

Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternatives. ~ Maurice Chevalier

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