VITAS & VLADA

The morgue needed someone to identify the body, so they sent for his two buddies, Vitas and Vlada.

The three men had always been best friends; they hunted and fished together and were long time members of a hunt camp.

Vitas arrived first, and when the mortician pulled back the sheet, Vitas said, ‘Vell, his face is burned up pretty bad. You better roll him over.’

The mortician rolled him over and Vitas said, ‘Nope, that ain’t Stanley .’ The mortician thought this was rather strange.

So he brought Vlada in to confirm the identity of the body.

Vlada looked at the body and said, ‘Yup, he’s pretty well burnt up. Roll him over… ‘The mortician rolled him over and Vlada said, ‘No, it ain’t our best friend, Stanley.’

The mortician asked, ‘How can you tell?’ Vlada said, ‘Well, Stanley had two assholes.’ ‘What? That’s impossible! Are you guys trying to tell me he had two assholes?’ asked the mortician.

‘Yup, we never seen ’em, but everybody used to say: