GEORGE CARLIN QUOTES

“Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?”

“What year did Jesus think it was?”

“The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post “Thou shalt not steal”, Thou shalt not commit adultery” and “Thou shalt not lie” in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment.”

“If the Cincinnati Reds were really the first major league baseball team, who did they play?”

“Have you ever noticed, in traffic, anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac!”