Washington D.C. Wednesday 6AM….
The US will trade the entire state of California for Hong Kong in a flat exchange. “Basically everyone in California wants to be a Commie and all Hong Kong wants to be American, so we did what we call a win-win-win and traded the two in a tremendous deal,” Trump said in a press conference announcing the unprecedented deal.

After months of growing trade tensions between the US and China leading to an impending global recession, along with mounting strife in China’s Hong Kong province prompting dissidents to wave American flags, U.S. President Donald Trump has negotiated quite possibly the biggest deal of his life. Markets responded with a complete turnaround from recent declines. Californians and Hong Kongers were dancing in their respective streets. Californians happy about the 1-child-only policy and in the near future, the Communist party will govern and give free benefits and low taxes to all.

So, it finally happened and the tariff war is ended. Hong Kong is happy about being part of the free world once again, As for right now…the Hong Kongers coming to America are all looking into opening a Chinese restaurant. On this side of the Pacific, the Californians are preparing for the day they move to the Orient, all are trying to outdo the next guy by taking lessons in Mandarin. I remember this much from my early days when there were Chinese laundries everywhere…And the only Chinese I ever understood was…”No tickee, no shirtee.”

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