FATHERHOOD

However, I’m sure you are perceptive enough to know that in life we all wear masks and people do not truly reveal themselves to others. One’s perception can be a barrier to reality and in my case I think part of that is because my inner mind still wishes to see my daughter as a wonderful little girl, just an innocent sweet pre-teen child of mine. From her viewpoint, I think she sees me as I was in my 30’s and 40’s; handsome and adoring my children yet with a short fuse and easy to anger and to be feared and loved at the same time.

Unfortunately, I just copied my father’s style of being a husband and a father, but he had it all wrong, and so did I. I would give us both a grade of “F” for fatherhood, but In spite of my shortcomings, the children turned out very well. I probably will never know their true feelings about me, and now I realize I made many mistakes, but that is all quite a normal situation in almost every family. All I have to do is look at my friends and their children and I see prevalent divorce, dysfunctional children, unhappy spouses and all kinds of problems. So, I feel I have done a fairly good job.

Yet, with what I know today, I was young, brainless and immature back then, but what about my conscience?

As I said, it’s all a matter of balance, as I did some things good and some things badly.

Of course, that’s just my opinion!