Old couple

Dear Abby:

My husband, Irving, is 93 and suffering from an incurable disease. Over the past 70 years, he has been a wonderful provider, great in the sack and a loving father, grandfather and great grandfather. He is also a fantastic bridge player and we play in tournaments held here in Hallandale, Florida. As much as I will miss him, I have to plan for my future since he “robbed the cradle” to marry me and I’m only 89.

Dear Abby, I ask you, are there any dating services I can check out before Irving is pushing up daisies and what night clubs would you recommend where a hot mama my age can find a nice young partner? I’m not talking right away since the doctor said he might have a month or two left but he’s fading fast. Irving said there’s not much reason to go on living, because since they closed down Too Jays Deli he can’t find a decent pastrami sandwich.

Any advice from you would be appreciated.
Yours truly,

Suddenly Almost Single Sadie in Hallandale


Dear Suddenly,

Since men in your age bracket tend to drop like flies, a plan to go with a guy in the 30-40 year-old group makes sense. Hey! Single Sadie, you’d be surprised how many men that age are attracted to liver spots and wrinkles. Here’s a tip, I know you can use…women who sweetly whisper details of their hip replacement surgery can really turn the guys on.

Oldies danceAs for clubs, I don’t know much about the night life in your area but I’ve heard the Hard Rock Casino might be a goldmine. Of course, you can always find the guys with the muscles at the beach, but if you go, don’t wear a Bikini.

Good luck, happy hunting and make sure the will and life insurance premiums are up to date.

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