A Woman’s Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you’re going to have trouble with it.

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.

Sign in a men’s urinal: Express Lane: Use Only If You’ve Had 3 beers or Less

Beauty is only a light switch away.

Make Love Not War. Or…do both…get married.

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