———————MONKEY BNDIT——————

By Harvey Tobkes

Yesterday, was his birthday, so I took my grandson David to the Metro Zoo in Miami and used a guide to take us on a tour. When we arrived at The Monkey House, she warned us that when people get too close to the cages the monkeys are somehow especially attracted to cellphones and are adept at grabbing them out of the hands of unsuspecting zoo visitors. She said they are trying hard to retrain the bad ones not to do that.

It gave me a great idea for a new business. What if we could take these bad, cellphone snatching monkeys and put ’em in movie theaters, put ’em in restaurants, put ’em in doctor’s waiting rooms. How great would that be?

Imagine you’e in a romantic upscale restaurant having dinner with your wife, and some guy at the next table is talking on his cellphone in an obnoxious, loud voice. Now, imagine again how great it would be if our Monkey Cellphone Bandit came to our rescue and plucked that cellphone right out of his hand.

I would give that monkey all the peanuts he could eat!

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