By Patrick Hurley

It is popular these days to come up with hypothetical questions to escape from the monotony of our own boring existence. This week’s question is a personal doozy:

If you could go back and be any age of your life and remain there until you die, what AGE would you choose and why? The #1 answer is 25-years-old.

This makes perfect sense. You would be in the prime of your life and yet not too stupid like you were when you were eighteen and thought you knew everything. You could still go out and drink and not be wiped out by your hangover. You could toss the football around and be able to walk nimbly to the bathroom the next morning. You could date women of just about any (legal) age and be socially accepted.

Yep, that would be a great age to live the rest of your life on. But, but, but, there are a few drawbacks, and here they are…

First of all, remember you are not going to get any older. This means you will have to work for the rest of your life since you will never reach retirement age. The kind of money I made at 25 was nowhere NEAR the money I made ten years later so that means you are going to live on a limited income forever!

Secondly, you will always look young which is cool to Paris Hilton but not to a banker or a CEO. To them, you will always be immature unless you are rich enough to buy your own country. Otherwise, you will be paying your business dues in perpetuity.

Then, there are your parents!

Your mom is going to constantly wonder why you are not married. Your dad is going to harass you with THE question: “When ya gonna grow up and get a REAL job?” One of the joys of growing older is that you can shut them up over the years. Not at twenty-five, you can’t. Not for the next eighty years. Nope.

Finally, you will never change your life. You will always love the SAME music, the SAME kind of car, the SAME social life, the SAME kinds of movies, the SAME political views and the SAME kinds of relationships. There is no development. No regrets. No life lessons. You are stuck in surrealistic impasse that whirls around you like an unending cesspool of the SAME stuff day after day after day after day.

Tomorrow’s new fantasy is this: If you could pick any Super Power which one would it be?

I will give you two hints concerning my answer:
X-ray vision and living next door to Kim Kardashian.
A man can only dream!

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