“MY DAY” – A RETIREE IN FLORIDA

Old-kisser

When I retired, my wife and I moved into a “over 55 only” retirement condo on Florida’s Southeast coast. We are living in a development with a Golf course, Exercise Center, Spa, and Tennis Club on Lake Fake-a-hachee. There are 3000 lakes in Florida; only three are real.

Our biggest daily concern as retirees is time management. What are we going to do all day? Allow me take you through our typical routine. We get up at 6:00 AM, have a quick orange juice and join the early morning Walk and Talk Club. Then we go back to our penthouse apartment and have our 7 o’clock breakfast.

Let me assure you, passing the time is not a problem, as
the days will seem to be eaten up by simple pursuits.

Now comes the next activity … my wife puts on her Esther Williams designer bathing suit and goes directly to the pool for her under water Pilates class. I put on my ‘Ask me about my Grandchildren’ T-shirt, my denim mid-calf shorts, my New Balance sneakers and go to the club house to watch the financial news with the boys.

Before you know it, it’s 11 o’clock; it’s time for lunch. We go to Costco to partake of the many tasty samples dispensed by ladies in white hair nets. All free, by the way! After a gourmet lunch served on crackers, if we don’t have any doctor appointments, we might make our daily visitation to Publix to do some food shopping. Finding a suitable parking spot takes 20 minutes. After that chore is done, the next challenge is to find our white car but like most seniors, we can’t remember where we parked, so we wander the lot full of 10,000 white cars while our food defrosts. If that’s not frustrating enough try shopping at Wal-Mart. It takes 1/2 hour on the check-out line in and 1 hour to return the item the next day.

Before going home, we decide to make a stop at the Gulfstream Flea Market. We arrive and take our requisite afternoon exercise stroll down the aisles…we look but do not buy anything. O.K. I admit, once I bought a genuine imitation Rolex watch for $2.00. Somehow, we always end up at the “Food Court,” so we luck out and find a clean table for two and nosh on a knish or a hot dog or both.

We’re usually back home by 3:30 PM to get ready for dinner. People start lining up for the early bird about 4 PM; we get there by 4:30 because we’re late eaters. The dinners are very popular because of the large portions they serve. You can take home enough food for the next day’s lunch and dinner, including extra bread, crackers, packets of mustard, relish, ketchup and Sweet-and-Low along with mints.

At 6 PM we’re home ready to watch a little TV; we particularly like the 6:30 news with Brian Williams and later Jeopardy from 7:30 to 8, but shortly after that we’re in bed and fast asleep. During the night I get up and make 5 or 6 trips to the bathroom and before I know it, it’s time to get up and start a new day all over again.

As a side note, doctor related activities take up a lot of your retirement time. I enjoy reading old magazines in sub-zero temperatures in the waiting room, so I don’t mind. Calling for test results also helps the days fly by. It takes at least half an hour just getting through the doctor’s phone menu. Then there’s the hold time until you’re connected to the right party. Sometimes they forget you’re holding, and the whole office goes off to lunch.

I hope this material has been helpful to you future retirees. If I can be of any further assistance, please look me up when you’re in Florida.. I live in The Leaning Condos of Pisa in Hallandale Beach.

Author: Anonymous. My guess? Probably written by an oldie with too much time on his hands.


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